How to handle obstacles in life?

When things dont turn out as you want it to be, dont ever give up. I have went through a few obstacles in life for the past few months and I have managed to survived through by having faith and confidence in myself.

Life is not always great. Always remember that. You may feel lonely at times when you feel like there is no one to turn to at your lowest point. You may feel like no one will ever understand how you feel and what you are going through. But, someone out there do know. God knows as well.

1) Dont ever suppress your feelings because one day, you will explode and things may turn out ugly. So just release that anger, depression, pain and etc by crying out loud, or shopping, or exercising, or eating or whatever that makes you feel better. But, dont do negative and aggressive actions that will hurt yourself or others.

2) However, give yourself a timeline at your own pace. Remind yourself that every minute you had spent being upset means that you have lost 60seconds of happiness. Hence, dont sulk for too long. As cliche as it sounds, time heals all wounds.

3) Talk to someone whom you can trust especially your family members. They will never turn their back against you. If not, talk to God. You dont have to tell the whole world about your problem. Remember, you owe no one the obligation to tell.

4) Always tell yourself that this is just a bump in life and after this bump, life will be better. Have a little faith in yourself. It is true, life is unfair...BUT, I believe after every bump, we will be stronger, wiser and more matured.

5) Dress up. Make yourself look good. When you look good, you feel good. It exerts a positive energy in you. You can also change your hairstyle by dying a new color or chopping off that long hair of yours! Let a new change, change you!

6) Dont ever drown yourself with alcohol or drugs. They are just temporary cure to your problem. It may stop you from thinking about it for a day, a week or a month but it will never take away the sorrow and pain. You will still have to face the problem eventually. So, suck it up and move on. Be brave.

7) Meditate. I find this the easiest way to calm myself down. Spend just 15 to 30 minutes of your day, sitting down and just totally shut your mind off everything and just meditate. This will guide you to see things in a clearer view. To think outside of the box. Sometimes, when things happen too quickly, we tend to lose focus in analyzing what exactly happened. Why? Because our emotions give in to what we are supposed to do. So, meditate to calm your mind.

So, those are the tips I find helpful in facing obstacles in life. I know it is easy to say than done. Life is never easy. The older we grow, the more burden we have to carry. We start to realize how cruel and materialistic the world is. How trust and loyalty in people are hard to find while betrayal and lies are what we normally get.

When someone walks out of your life, let them. There is no point in wasting your time on people that leave you especially when you need them the most. Remember that in order to live your life to the fullest, tie yourself to a goal and not to people or things. You may miss them but tell yourself that they are the ones who gave up, not you.

Attachment is like a beautiful poison apple. The more attached you are to people or something, the more pain you will obtain. This poison will eat you up slowly. I am not saying that you should not get attached to anything. Limit yourself to it as you will be the one at the losing end if you dont.

Nevertheless, always do what you believe is right. Although good people suffer more from others, but they get good rewards in the end while bad people only obtain temporary happiness and ended up with regrets. Always believe in karma. Dont expect everyone to treat you the way you want them to but treat everyone the way you want to be treated.

Most importantly, love yourself and be positive in life. Live your life happily and not filled with regrets. Let the positive energy flow within you and be proud of yourself for being able to pull yourself out of the darkness. Be grateful to those who have guided you through and to God for always being there for you. :)

"Great things are not done by impulse but by a series of small things brought together-Vincent Van Gogh"

Monogamy

The word "monogamy" really interests me. I just started watching SATC (Sex and The City) season 1 and I came across one of the episode concerning Monogamy. What do you guys think of monogamy? Do people in this era still practice monogamy? Do YOU believe in committing yourself to one forever?

To me, feelings is indescribable. One minute you feel like you are in love, the next minute you might be hating for the rest of your life. Therefore, i dont think I can believe in monogamy. The world divorce rate is increasing gradually. Its like a cool disease in this era where people just divorce whenever love doesnt exist in their relationship anymore. Women are getting stronger and the ugly truth is women no longer rely on men and vice versa. Im not saying that people shoudnt practice monogamy or the opposite-polygamy. Its just really amazing if one gets to meet the other half and spend the rest of his life with her. Think about it. Can you actually control your attractions towards other people and fully focus just on one till you die?

I seriously doubt that people practice it. People nowadays are too greedy. Their needs and wants is a never ending list. What more to say love for others? People are cheating one another these days and it seems to be a normal action and not a sin. Im one greedy fellow too. Admit it, you are greedy too, isnt it?

Frankly, marriage is a big deal to me. Its like totally giving the whole me to someone else. Trusting him to take care of me and accepting all my flaws. Exchanging vows and swear to never hurt each other for the rest of my life. Though monogamy is something hard to achieve in the future, I still hope that one day, when I reach the moment of marriage, Im sure to hold on to it till I die.

LDR

LDR stands for Long Distance Relationships. So, the question is..do you believe that LDR works? Do you believe in absence makes the heart grow fonder?

I used to think that LDR is just a waste of time and love doesn't exist when the other part of you is out of your reach. BUT.. i do believe in it now. I really do. And I'm thankful for experiencing it myself. LDR doesn't work if both parties doesn't help each other to survive. It's hard. Of course it is. To not being able to cuddle next to him/her whenever you feel cold or upset. To not being able to get a hug or kiss to feel his/her love. Sometimes, you'll feel like giving up and thinking that this is all bullshits and worthless. But somehow, all these mixed anger and love feelings make the relationship stronger. Trust me. Its all a matter of trust, patience, and love.

Both parties have to be honest with each other. Trust is very important. When there's no trust, jealousy, anger and sadness will arise. The guy has to be the patient one because girls get emotional easily. So guys, bear in mind that patience is the key to good relationships! And most importantly, L.O.V.E. Without love, whats the point of being together? Whats the point of wanting to try LDR? It's not fun to play someone's feelings by promising to love him/her when you are not. It's not fun to lie and cheat behind your partner. Its a CRIME. Try not to break someone's heart because, what goes around comes around. To those heartless bad ass people, doesn't mean that there is always someone else to love you if you dump the current one. You'll never know that one day, you're the one being dumped and left to cry alone. No one wants to be a loner, isnt it?

Anyways, my point is, distance and time will never be a problem when it comes to relationships as long as both parties find the relationship worthwhile to hold onto. I believe that the existence of love makes our life more meaningful. So, to those who are afraid of getting hurt, don't be. To those who has never tried LDR, you should all give it a try. Dare to love. Dare to get hurt. Miracles do happen :) I love my life now with 'him' in it. So all the best to all of you with your current and future relationships! *applause*

Manukan Island (Kota Kinabalu)

I LOVE KK! (:

Life

its 12.12am and I have decided to update my blog.

People come and go in life. And life doesn't always have to perfect. Sometimes, the more we want things to be the way we want it to be, the worse the outcome. Everything happens for a reason, thats what we all say to each other. BUT, have we ever thought about the reasons to why it happened? When we make mistakes, do we actually confess or admit that we are wrong? Most of us tend to hide our wrongdoings and blame it on others to make ourselves feel better and yet, at end of the day, we are the ones sufferings for not admitting it.

None of us like failing. And we definitely hate losing to others. Winning is what everyone wants to get. Winning is something so easy to say and yet, so hard to achieve. Along the way to success, there are sacrifices. Without putting in effort to gain something, how are we supposed to win? Some people get lucky, some people don't. I believe in luck and when luck is not on my side, I feel beaten and sometimes, upset. We fall all the time. It doesn't matter how many times have we fall before. What really matters how many times have we fall and stood up with our head held high? How many times have we told ourselves to do better the next time? Each time we fall, each time we learn something new. Thus, we have trained ourselves to be better and stronger.

Confidence is really important. Honestly, when I was little, I have very low self-esteem. I have always been an average kid. Everything in my life is just average. Nothing awesome to brag about as I don't have much achievements. Back in high school, I'm not smart like most of my classmates. I'm not good in sports or socializing too. Hence, I have never been a confident kid. Traditionally, we chinese believe that we should all learn to be humble. Well, humble is good but being too humble is bad too. We should all learn to stand up for ourselves when we are being bullied or put down. Believe in our own abilities as that is the only way to be successful and happy too.

I do live my life happily. I have met different types of people in my life. There are definitely sly ones but these people has taught me to be wiser when it comes to making new friends. I do look back and laugh at my past mistakes and dumb moments. We all have our unglam moments and its okay because those moments will teach us to not repeat them again. Sounds funny but its true.

Some people just never learn to let go of the past. They tend to build in hatred over certain people and never learn to forgive. What's the point of wasting your time and anger towards someone unworthy? Why not learn to forgive and be happy? Hatred is the last thing I want to have in mind towards someone. Life is too short to be hating towards others.

So my dear friends, be happy with what you have in life. Make the best out of everything we do! AND, most importantly, BE AWESOMEEE! (: